SHIFT HAPPENS | SEASON 4 • EPISODE 8

Ryan Haddon: How To Get Right With What Is

SHIFT HAPPENS is a Global Take on Women’s Turning Points and Pivotal Moments

In this last episode of Season 4, Ryan Haddon, author, life coach, hypnotherapist, mediation teacher, and sound & breath work facilitator, discusses the importance of learning to sit with disappointment, loss, and setbacks, and to “get right with what is”. She shares tools like breath work, meditation, and self-analysis to help process difficult emotions and find contentment. Ryan’s pivotal moment unfolded when she decided to leave the fast-paced life of LA for a farm in Pennsylvania. This transition involved shedding her old identity and embracing a simpler more grounded existence, which was both challenging and transformative. Ryan and Claudia had this conversation in early November of 2024, by the end of December her mother Dayle Haddon, passed away. In this episode Ryan talks about her deep admiration for her mother, who has repeatedly reinvente herself and never let others limited perspectives define her.

Season 4 has been dedicated to Dayle Haddon.

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About Our Guest

Ryan Haddon

Ryan Haddon is a certified Life Coach, Hypnotherapist, Meditation Teacher, and Sound & Breathwork facilitator with over 20 years of experience helping others to thrive. She has worked with hundreds of private clients, global brands and companies.

Ryan has curated personalized wellness experiences for corporate organizations that include LVMH, The CAA Talent Agency, Tracy Anderson Fitness, Poosh Wellness, Food + Mood, ELEMIS, Visionary Women, The Second Shift, DIOR Paris, U.S Government agencies and many others where she has shared mindfulness modalities to thousands of people.

Upon its inception and launch, Ryan was a teacher of multiple weekly classes, and the founding Director of Programming at Sage + Sound, a high-profile wellness space dedicated to mental and emotional fitness on NYC’s Upper East Side, which was featured in The New York Times, Town and Country magazine and WWD. She designed the curriculum and the schedule, managing and hiring 25 teachers with 40 classes a week.

Ryan was the in-house life coach for Kourtney Kardashian’s online wellness website Poosh where she wrote over 50 mind/body/spirit articles over the course of two years. Ryan has been featured in a variety of top online and print publications, writing articles for Oprah Daily, Shape Magazine, Authority Magazine, MindBodyGreen, Parent’s Magazine, Tracy Anderson Magazine and several more.

Ryan has been a guest on over 70 podcasts in iTunes top 100 such as Nick Viall’s The Viall Files, Whitney Port’s With Whit, and Whine Down with Jana Kramer appearing as an expert in the areas of parenting, relationships, recovery, self development, purpose and spirituality.

As a frequent guest expert in national television markets, Ryan has appeared on over 30 talk shows including appearances on New York Living, Great Day Washington, Your California Live, CBS 58, CHEDDAR, DC News Now and many more, where she speaks about relationships, self-development, and a purpose-driven life.

A sought-after public speaker for corporate retreats and wellness events. Ryan runs private workshops such as “Stepping Into Your Purpose,” “The Work/Life Balance,” and “Finding Your Center.” Ryan also offers global online courses including “The Relationship Triumvirate” and “Sovereign Women.”

About Your Host

Claudia Mahler is a creative activist, with more than a decade of experience curating meaningful conversations for women in business, art and education in Europe and the United States.

She designs events for women’s empowerment that emphasize organic connection and conversation to complement existing professional development training in a variety of work environments.

She has 20+ years of experience in communications and PR in Europe and the East Coast of the United States.

Transcript

Ryan Haddon: How To Get Right With What Is

00:00:02:02 – 00:00:32:00
Ryan
I think it’s about the ability to self-soothe, that we can’t lead if we don’t have the ability to listen as well as not fold, and we can’t. It can’t be on empty. We can’t give away what we don’t have. So it becomes this trickle down and becomes really important for the leaders in companies to be able to not be maxed out, to not be putting so much value on productivity, which is important, but it’s also on the caliber of presence that they have the ability to bring their problem solving.

00:00:32:00 – 00:00:52:08
Ryan
But first, to be able to make sure that they’re regulated, to make sure that they are in a place where they can receive and also be able to give. Now, this sounds very woo, and I get that. But at the end of the day, this is how we can really connect with each other.

00:00:52:10 – 00:01:26:21
Claudia
Hello and welcome back to Shift Happens. This is my season four finale Tadaa. In today’s episode, I’m in a sort of cosmic and sparkling conversation with Ryan Haddon about practical spirituality, breathwork, tapping, meditation, and other ways of reconnecting to our own senses and rhythms. Ryan is an author, life and spiritual coach, hypnotherapist, meditation teacher, mother of four, and sound and breathwork facilitator.

00:01:26:23 – 00:02:06:02
Claudia
With over 20 years of experience helping others to thrive, individuals, groups and corporations. Ryan and I recorded the episode last fall, shortly after I spoke to her late mother. Dale had an on shift happens. Dale passed away only in December. Ryan and I discussed back then the challenges of shifts and loss and change. And Ryan put it beautifully that life is never still, and that there are seasons for our various states of happiness, of grief, of loss, of joy.

00:02:06:04 – 00:02:32:01
Claudia
She put it so. Yes, practical that I was truly mesmerized by her words. Tune in to the special finale and enjoy Ryan’s soothing voice and deep insights.

00:02:32:03 – 00:03:03:17
Claudia
Welcome, Ryan Haddon. Thank you so much. To be with me on shift. Happens this morning. We just talked about how blessed we are with this glorious weather. So, Ryan, I’m so excited to have you here. Life coach, spiritual coach. Meditation teacher, hypnotherapist. I read so much about you and all the things you do. It’s unbelievable. I mean, you are a very calm whirlwind, it seems.

00:03:03:22 – 00:03:07:20
Ryan
I love that. Thank you so much. It’s.

00:03:07:22 – 00:03:20:05
Claudia
So, before we start to talk about your shift and pivotal moment that you want to share with us, I want to ask you a few questions. What is your current state of mind?

00:03:20:07 – 00:03:31:01
Ryan
I feel calm, I feel centered. I feel hope. And, I just feel expansion. That’s where I am today. That is the truth.

00:03:31:03 – 00:03:45:16
Claudia
That’s great. So we’re all going to be, gravitating towards you in these very, times that bring a lot of us into turmoil. I think to have, like, a calm, rooted person in our energy fields is so important, right?

00:03:45:19 – 00:04:09:01
Ryan
Yes. And I think we take turns. We have seasons of feeling set. And I think that’s the reality that we can always meet everything head on. We have this, you know, very peaceful state of mind. I don’t think that’s a that’s a fair expectation for us as humans. We get triggered, we get fearful. We, you know, but our birthright is joy.

00:04:09:01 – 00:04:32:10
Ryan
I do believe that. I believe is freedom. It’s expansion. All the things that I mentioned. So we can move towards it. But then we can be exactly where we are when we’re in a more complicated emotion, of grief or sadness or loss or fear, you know, which sometimes, you know, I think in the spiritual community especially, we tend to poopoo and say, you’re not doing enough.

00:04:32:12 – 00:04:47:18
Ryan
You’re not spiritual enough. You’re not centered enough. And I really just want to normalize all feelings and emotions. And I think we take turns in the feelings. Yeah, in a way. Yeah. That’s good. Yeah.

00:04:47:20 – 00:04:52:04
Claudia
How would you describe your idea of perfect happiness? Well.

00:04:52:04 – 00:05:19:04
Ryan
I think happiness is fleeting. I think that contentment is something that we can strive towards, of just trying to stay balanced and trying to be with what is. I think that I’ve had many times where, things haven’t gone my way or, I feel disappointed, but I can practice and I’ve been able to anchor into some contentment and trust and surrender and knowing again, this is a season.

00:05:19:04 – 00:05:37:16
Ryan
So these are these are tools that we can cultivate. And you know, you mentioned at the top why I have so many different ways that, I meet people and those places to help them anchor into that, because let’s just go the way we want, does it? It just doesn’t. So how do we sit with disappointment? How do we sit with loss?

00:05:37:16 – 00:05:59:19
Ryan
How do we sit with the setback? That becomes a measure of, I think, just worth for me that that’s where I would I’ve curated that in my own life. And I sit with my clients in those spaces to be able to sit with that and be able to get right with what is, and that becomes important and becomes mastery, really.

00:05:59:21 – 00:06:00:11
Ryan

00:06:02:14 – 00:06:06:20
Claudia
Which living person do you most admire?

00:06:06:22 – 00:06:38:17
Ryan
I’d have to say you’ve had my mom on as a guest, so I’d, I’d have to point the arrow towards her because she’s just such a, a unique and dynamic and powerful individual. I don’t know anyone who has recreated themselves as many times as she has. As we get so rooted in our identity of who we are, whether it’s our politics or, how we see the world and our beliefs and our, our, you know, how we view ourselves and how others views and the projections onto us.

00:06:38:17 – 00:06:59:17
Ryan
And to have someone such as my mom, who’s recreated herself over and over again, hasn’t been defined by people’s limited perspective on her for aging or for, She’s just let her creativity and, the great wishes as a person kind of lead her. And I’m interested in hearing the podcast that you did together.

00:06:59:19 – 00:07:09:01
Claudia
It’s a wonderful conversation. Yeah. She’s stunning. Yes. I mean, just everything about her. It’s real. Yeah. She’s very special.

00:07:09:01 – 00:07:22:08
Ryan
She is very special. And she, she’s one of my closest friends. I’m sure she said the same thing. She Yeah. Constantly you know, directs things back to me, which is why I’m here. So you know.

00:07:22:10 – 00:07:23:01
Claudia
Exactly.

00:07:23:01 – 00:07:50:01
Ryan
She promoted this conversation between us, and that’s who she is. She’s one of those rare birds, those where women are constantly elevating other women. And, I love that it’s a true gauge of feeling there is enough that we are so we can hold space for others and certain women, and we can celebrate and uplift and highlight them in our lives or our girlfriends or our, our work or coworkers.

00:07:50:03 – 00:07:57:05
Ryan
I think there’s just that feeling, that tightness can we can really let that go. That’s another mark of, I think, evolving.

00:07:57:08 – 00:08:07:07
Claudia
Yeah I agree. I mean, we we not only can lift them up, I think we have to without meaning it in a precious way. But as a response ability I feel.

00:08:07:09 – 00:08:14:09
Ryan
Yeah. Yeah.

00:08:14:11 – 00:08:45:03
Claudia
Yeah. So as you shared with me that you left Los Angeles for the life on a farm in Pennsylvania, and, of course, that’s, you know, apart from a move which is always huge. I’m sure that many things led to it. And what has been, you know, transformational for you mostly in this from, you know, going to a crazy LA life to settling down at a farm, which I’m sure is also not a calm life, but, yeah.

00:08:45:03 – 00:08:46:10
Ryan
Yes, there’s a lot of things.

00:08:46:11 – 00:08:47:22
Claudia
A little bit about that. Yes.

00:08:47:23 – 00:09:08:00
Ryan
A lot of plate spinning here on the farm and lots of animals, children. And, you know, I’m a steward of this, of this land that’s been lent to me in this time. I live in a 17th century house. So this land is ancient in our country. You know, you speak about Europe, and that’s just old hat there. But here it’s, you know, this land, this.

00:09:08:00 – 00:09:27:18
Ryan
I mean, the land’s been here, but this home and this land that we that we are, you know, shepherding is on land. And so we, we try to honor it in all the ways that we can. Through all the heartbeats that live on here, including my own. So it’s beautiful but leaving la why that was so important.

00:09:27:18 – 00:09:48:07
Ryan
And you had asked me what was a pivotal moment for me. There have been many. And so one of those was really, I think we find ourselves in a time where people have to just take an inventory of their life. And how is where I’m living, where I’m working, who I’m in partnership with, how is this feeding and sustaining me?

00:09:48:09 – 00:10:07:16
Ryan
How am I, being nurtured in this? And how am I thriving in this? And we saw this many, you know, a few years ago of people really saying, I can’t, I’m leaving city life and I’m wanting to find my roots and put roots somewhere else so I can have more sovereignty so I can have more agency. When world affairs happened.

00:10:07:16 – 00:10:34:05
Ryan
So you found a lot of people came through my practice renegotiating themselves, renegotiating their priorities, and perhaps even, leaning into hopes and dreams that they had put on the burner. So that was one of the beautiful things that happened in a contraction. There was an expansion for many. And, you know, I 13 years ago I left Los Angeles, and it was one of those moments for me where I really felt like I had gained everything.

00:10:34:08 – 00:11:02:02
Ryan
I possibly had squeezed all the learnings out of that town’s really runs, you know, in many ways on people, places and things. It has it has a certain frequency to it as, as many of these really dynamic, wonderful cities do. And I hadn’t received many lessons there that only that city could have taught me and the people in it, and the priorities of that town, the Hollywood and the red carpet and all those things, you know, afforded me.

00:11:02:04 – 00:11:21:09
Ryan
And so those were very valuable lessons. And I received what I felt like I needed to. And then I started feeling good, stranger in my own town. I started to feel like it was getting harder to meditate and shut out the noise. And you know, my husband and this is a beautiful thing when you’re in partnership, sometimes one of us has the vision and the other doesn’t, so it’s who we put our wagon to.

00:11:21:11 – 00:11:50:10
Ryan
And literally, my husband was a pioneer and said, let’s, let’s take our wagon across the the United States and Pennsylvania because he wanted to restore an old farmhouse. That was sort of his dream. And I had felt this. That was just that. Who would I be if I wasn’t, you know, defined by all the friendships I had, all the identity points that I had, what would happen if I could, be in more quiet, be in more stillness without all this external noise?

00:11:50:12 – 00:12:10:07
Ryan
What would that feel like? So I started to get curious, and I think curiosity is a great, path forward when there’s things. Of course, when we think about changing and shifting who we are and how we see ourselves, you know, fears, you know, oh, my God, I’m going to lose something. That’s usually the first reaction. But if we can just the curiosity of that kind of can lead to that excitement.

00:12:10:11 – 00:12:32:00
Ryan
So for me, it was thinking of I’d always had this thought about chickens. So it sounds absurd, but that was a guidepost. So I started looking at these fantastic plumage of chickens and breeds and, so that was that, this, this one little through line was they kind of pulled me out of the city and people around me like or like, what are you doing?

00:12:32:00 – 00:12:52:07
Ryan
This is crazy. What do you where are you going to live? On a farm. What do you mean? You’re going to be back? You’ll be back. You’ll miss the weather. There’s like, there’s a lot of naysayers. So that resistance actually shaped me up. And, there was grace involved because I, you know, I had to have a spiritual program and I do a spiritual connection.

00:12:52:09 – 00:13:14:20
Ryan
So I really started to tune. I curated this voice that was inside me, this inner voice. And I started listening to that voice. And then, of course, the chickens and my husband, some new things. And I was six months pregnant. So it was this idea of bringing this soul into a different experience. I had two older kids my first marriage, and I wanted something different for them.

00:13:14:20 – 00:13:34:11
Ryan
They were going into their pre-teens, and I was starting to see how this world was also shaping them. They were talking about box office, you know, weekends and just kind of the L.A. vibe and celebrities and like that, that are it’s very un high volume there. No knock to it. But that was what I was sort of sensing and seeing.

00:13:34:11 – 00:13:44:16
Ryan
And I thought, what would it be like for us all to have this? So that’s what we did. And we got in our covered wagon pretty much, and went across the country, loaded it all up. And,

00:13:44:18 – 00:13:47:12
Claudia
It was it was a challenging in the beginning.

00:13:47:12 – 00:14:07:17
Ryan
It was all. Yeah, it was because what I noticed was that this noise that I was saying was on the outside of me that I was trying to shut out. I realized there was quite a bit of noise on the inside, too. So when you land in a place with all that stimulation, without all that stimulation, without all the going out to lunches with friends and all the things that are beautiful and valuable, I’m not knocking that at all.

00:14:07:17 – 00:14:27:15
Ryan
It’s incredible. But, without all those other extracurriculars and different events that I would go to and things, that stillness was deafening and that quiet was deafening, and I felt like I was being turned inside out. So there was a period. It was a rite of passage, an initiation to, that stillness and then that, of course, I had a baby.

00:14:27:15 – 00:14:43:16
Ryan
And there was, there was that that having that moment, you know, which is it’s, another rite of passage in its own. Even if it was my third, it still felt like each child felt like the tools that I had from the previous didn’t work with that one, or that the little methods I had. So it’s always humbling.

00:14:43:18 – 00:14:44:13
Ryan

00:14:44:15 – 00:14:45:09
Claudia

00:14:45:11 – 00:15:00:12
Ryan
So there was that. And then of course we renovated this home that we’re in now, this 17th century home and you know, took it down to the studs. And my husband is a genius with those things. And, but it was you know, it was another leap of faith for me because I’d never done I was a turnkey resident.

00:15:00:12 – 00:15:17:19
Ryan
I was a jokester. The turnkey out, a gal with crown moldings. And I like to walk in and be like, it’s done, you know? Yeah, this is quite a bit of living in a guest house. Yeah. And to preteens, all crammed in with dogs and of course, the chickens. We had built a chicken coop so that we got that instantly.

00:15:17:19 – 00:15:23:15
Ryan
My husband, smart man. He’s like, let’s get the chickens. You know. And so it.

00:15:23:15 – 00:15:24:15
Claudia
Really keep her busy.

00:15:24:15 – 00:15:47:04
Ryan
Yes, it brought us closer. And, you know, like I said, I just I love where I am, and it was also beautiful because when there was this exodus of cities for other people, they they found me as a coach because I had spoken about that. And they said, show me how to do this. How do I work through the fear, the anxiety, the resistance of the people around me?

00:15:47:04 – 00:16:06:20
Ryan
Because people don’t always want us to. They’re not always so supportive of that because they do. They can lose, you know. And they did my friends back and they were like, we’re not going to have the same relationship. And they were right. It did. It did shift. It did change, you know. So there yeah. Seasons of loss and shift and change and feeling, listening to that inner voice trusting.

00:16:06:22 – 00:16:07:13
Claudia

00:16:07:15 – 00:16:29:18
Ryan
You know, that we’re up for this adventure and that we can recreate ourselves. That’s why I honor my mom so much because she’s done that with, so sometimes, so it really is. I think it’s a mark of, again, talking. We talk about Mark of mastery. I think it’s a mark of also trust in that we are supremely creative beings and we can put roots down anywhere.

00:16:29:18 – 00:16:57:00
Ryan
I had to do that with my first husband and when he moved to London. And so I had done this before and moved on my little kids at that time, there were two and four over to London and, you know, drove on the other side of the street and took classes at the Vienna and rode through Hyde Park on horseback and like, really just I know how to land somewhere and pull in the tools around me, able to, make a life, make a home.

00:16:57:02 – 00:17:18:01
Ryan
And I trust that that’s where my spirituality is so practical, because it’s not the esoteric idea that I just did meditation and I feel better. It’s that I trust that, the right people will fall into my lap. I’ll listen to something and I’ll know that this is an open door to walk through. So, you know, of course, I grapple with fear.

00:17:18:01 – 00:17:32:14
Ryan
We all have those things or grapple with doubt. But, that throughline is carried me for so many decades now. This very practical relationship I have with my this, this with spirit.

00:17:32:16 – 00:18:01:22
Claudia
Yeah. And I read that you really support people in being their best allies. And and I love that. Right? I mean, we tend to look to the outside to find the answers and to find the inspiration and maybe also the safety. And we tend to neglect at least you know, in these very busy, bubbling surroundings, to connect and to see that we, we can find that in ourselves.

00:18:02:00 – 00:18:30:17
Ryan
Yes. It becomes so important. We always talk about the self-talk. What’s going on on the inside. How do you how are you speaking to yourself when there’s a setback? How do you what’s that running in the current throughout your day? Because we have something like 30 to 60,000 thoughts a day and most of them are unkind. So starting to notice where you, the contractions and then how you speak to yourself when they happen or, you know, and making an effort.

00:18:30:19 – 00:18:42:16
Ryan
So first of all, there’s that observation which sounds really self obsessive, but it’s not because everything begins with how we see ourselves and what we think we’re worthy of. So there’s that piece of noticing that, that negativity.

00:18:42:21 – 00:18:43:09
Claudia

00:18:43:09 – 00:19:04:06
Ryan
And then it’s also making, concerted effort in finding the places where you can say, that was a nice thought. That was kind thing that you just said and did. Wow, that was brave. Oh, I like how you know that and speak it into yourself. And it might really begin in that way as you would a toddler, as you would, someone that you hold dearly.

00:19:04:11 – 00:19:23:17
Ryan
So, I mean, everybody knows this, but it’s just a reminder. So starting there, you’ll see how, how quickly you can change, the inner climate, and then you’ll start to see how it starts to shift on the outside of you, because we’re are the master creator. And so, yes, we have so much agency. Yes, we are creative beings.

00:19:23:19 – 00:19:45:22
Ryan
And it’s good to be around mentors. It’s good to be. I’ve had my path is littered with powerful women who have been way showers when I couldn’t let myself out of a dark hole, or I couldn’t shift my thinking and, they pointed a path forward, and then I got what I needed in every great way. Show shower should be telling you, pointing you back to your own power.

00:19:45:22 – 00:20:04:20
Ryan
If they’re not and they’re having there’s a dependency there, then that’s not for the highest. But I think anyone should be telling you again and again. You are so powerful. You are the master creator of your thoughts, your actions, your beliefs, and your your relationships and your purpose. All the ways that we show up in the world that make our life meaningful.

00:20:04:21 – 00:20:27:09
Ryan
But sometimes we need people to, help us get more tools. And that’s where I sit, where it’s like, how can I create so many tools, either through breath, through sound, through, self-regulation, through tapping, through all these different ways, through hypnosis to putting yourself into this very powerful, brainwave activity called theta and learning how to do that.

00:20:27:09 – 00:20:48:12
Ryan
So I do hypnosis for my clients, and they follow my voice for this. And we really, you know, I upload, I upload, it’s like we’re a hard drive, but it is we think of our brains are like a hard drive. We have these these thoughts and these, blueprints that have been laid down. These tapes, these recordings of what love is, what happiness is, what success is, what safety is.

00:20:48:14 – 00:21:07:08
Ryan
And they’re usually recorded from the ages of 0 to 7. So we’re, you know, it’s like we we land on the planet and we’re just like, what? We’re just constantly absorbing everything. And then after that, we pop more in through different brainwave states, but from 0 to 7, we’re in that absorbing state of theta. So we’re constantly recording.

00:21:07:08 – 00:21:27:17
Ryan
So if things weren’t favorable in that time, if there were fraught relationships, if there were people modeling to the best of their ability what love looked like, but perhaps it didn’t feel like that to you as a child. These are things that we will replay and attract to us again. And again in our lives, to our detriment to our favor and to our detriment.

00:21:27:19 – 00:21:58:17
Ryan
So again, we have that agency and we’re not victims, but it’s understanding the power of the subconscious mind. It runs 95% of our lives. It overrides the conscious mind, which is our willpower, which is our preferences, things like that. It really just we’re just downloading constantly the triggering, getting activated. So if you have a an inordinate reaction to a situation and you’re like, I don’t know why I keep reacting this way, it most likely points to something that happened at another time, either in a traumatic time or in your childhood at some time.

00:21:58:17 – 00:22:12:08
Ryan
So it becomes exciting and fun. You can hear the excitement in my voice, because this is a blueprint that you can go back to and renegotiate and hypnosis. But one tool, breathwork, is another way to do that.

00:22:12:10 – 00:22:13:09
Claudia
I love breath.

00:22:13:09 – 00:22:14:18
Ryan
Yes. What can.

00:22:14:20 – 00:22:39:21
Claudia
I really? I do it too little, but, I think it’s amazing. I mean, just the fact, you know, that I don’t know if there’s something exciting or even, you know, before a podcast. I sit down and take three deep breath. Yeah, just to center myself. And it’s such a, you know, easy two. Yes, it is. And I mean, I think that kids, all of us should learn this already, you know, from their parents or in kindergarten or so.

00:22:39:23 – 00:22:48:19
Claudia
Now there’s really and that has something to do with, you know, finding safety in yourself. Yes. I feel yes. When you take it’s an easy bridge.

00:22:48:19 – 00:22:55:18
Ryan
When you it’s an easy bridge when you take three deep breaths, you actually change the chemistry in your brain. You shift it.

00:22:55:18 – 00:22:56:19
Claudia
Really with three breaths.

00:22:56:19 – 00:23:15:20
Ryan
Yes. Three deep breaths. Deep breathing down into the belly. So it’s a powerful thing to do to just change that. It changes. It just changes the the site and flight system and into rest and digest. It is there’s so many things that it does and so doing it with intention. And, you know, I meet a lot of people who are like, I’ve tried breathwork, I don’t like it.

00:23:16:01 – 00:23:40:00
Ryan
There are so many forms of breathwork. So there’s there’s trendy ones, the Hollow Tropic, there’s Wim Hof, there’s just so many different types. And it’s again what season you’re in, depending that, breathwork might be more aligned to who you are in that place. And if you’re going through a very difficult time, you know, the type of breathwork that I do is a little bit gentler than hollow, like it’s a little bit slower, it’s a little bit more intuitive to the body.

00:23:40:02 – 00:24:00:12
Ryan
And doing it over a period of time. It really helps the body to release stuck emotions, helps to stop, a trauma that’s stored in the body. The body keep score. We’ve heard this over and over again. So doing the breath, it’s like the Supreme Intelligence. It’s the first thing we do when we enter the planet. And and an exhale is the last thing we do when we, when we depart.

00:24:00:14 – 00:24:22:21
Ryan
So the breath is release current that carries us through our life. And unfortunately, we’re constantly breathing shallow in this fight and flight like we’re treading water. These little sips there. So remembering, like you said, to take these micro moments when I do a corporate wellness events and I go into companies, I talk to them. I say, nobody wants to start a meditation practice, but find the ways because nobody has time for it.

00:24:22:23 – 00:24:45:00
Ryan
But how can you just find these micro moments? And it’s just with your breath. It’s just remembering, even putting reminders on your phone, these little ways to come back to your self, to pull in all your parts, to get out of this productivity mode, and to come back into this just into into some version of presence, whatever that is for you, where you actually can be more available to the moment.

00:24:45:02 – 00:25:12:04
Ryan
Otherwise, you know, if you have a meditation practice that starts in the beginning of the day, some people check that box and then they go on autopilot for the rest of the day, and then the day is a blur of activities and productivity. What I’m more interested in is creating a through line throughout your day. Micro moments of connection, micro moments of bringing yourself back from whatever it is you’re doing and bringing presence so it could be in your washing your dishes is bringing yourself in through your senses.

00:25:12:06 – 00:25:29:05
Ryan
You know, what am I feeling? What am I smelling or taking a walk? And really, you know, not being on your phone, you’re doing it or a podcast, which is great because I want people to listen to your podcast. Of course, of course do that. But also, turn this off too, because we’re getting so much information all the time.

00:25:29:05 – 00:25:51:04
Ryan
Once you’ve got that, once you’ve heard the podcast, turn it off even after this and just do those three deep breaths, let the information integrate within your system. Take what’s yours, what’s needed for you. And even while you’re listening to me right now, take those big deep breaths and, let that information integrate and assimilate into your system so that it’s yours.

00:25:51:04 – 00:26:16:03
Ryan
And it’s not just in this top line of a gathering, gathering, gathering all the time because, you know, I talk about the hard drive, but we are not computers. We are not. We are we are in this age of AI and transhumanism. But what makes us so beautiful is our ability to emote and our ability to sit with a feeling to to have compassion and empathy, to, really be the complexity that is us.

00:26:16:05 – 00:26:51:20
Ryan
And, you know, I, I’m a big believer. I was speaking at the UN with my mom, actually, another wonderful event, talking about AI and talking about, there’s this intersection between our mental health and, and, you know, AI and how that, how that can work together. And I have deep concerns about it because I, we have to normalize all the myriad of mental health issues that are happening here before we can just turn it over to the machines just yet and as are normalizing, grief.

00:26:51:20 – 00:27:15:06
Ryan
And like I said at the top of this podcast. So I guess if anything, if there’s any takeaway from anything worth saying is just be with the humanity that you are, find ways to let the emotion move through your system. Look into tapping. Try self assess. Do the breath. Meditation can be a walking meditation. It can be gazing at the sun.

00:27:15:11 – 00:27:39:06
Ryan
Obviously not at high noon, but it is very point to the day. It can be grounding and earthing and really connecting and feeling that you’re at your rear so you know you’re in the spiritual community. We’re always trying to ascend and open up, but we have to ground first. Ground is important. We’re so disconnected. So I think, yeah, you get on the earth and that that energy, the earth has a frequency.

00:27:39:06 – 00:27:45:19
Ryan
It’s called the Schumann resonance. And it’s what’s it called? Schumann. The Schumann. So.

00:27:45:21 – 00:28:09:03
Claudia
Okay, so, speaking of grounding and going back to your pivotal moments. So you went to Pennsylvania, you were on the farm. And when did you feel like I’ve arrived? Like, I’m curious, you know, always about this moment of transition. And there is the in-between that is has to do with so much upheaval and fear and curiosity and excitement.

00:28:09:03 – 00:28:20:12
Claudia
And it’s so. But when is when was this moment of where you thought, you know, I’ve arrived. This was a good decision and now you know the world is mine. Yes. Oh.

00:28:20:14 – 00:28:42:22
Ryan
There I am. Lots of little moments. I felt like I still had this umbilical. I lived in L.A. most of my adult life, and, you know, I felt like I was missing out here for a while. So I want to, you know, not say it was easy going for a while. For a long time. I missed my girlfriends, and I missed, you know, some of the things that I enjoyed doing there.

00:28:42:22 – 00:29:07:00
Ryan
I had deep spirituality that I had created there because I think L.A. is interesting that way. It has this very superficial overlay, but underneath it has this current of people really seeking the truth. So you’re a lot of great humans and you have a lot of great mentors. And that’s where I discovered hypnotherapy, because I myself, you know, was was able to heal a lot of different things with it.

00:29:07:02 – 00:29:29:13
Ryan
And so there that that I felt that pole I still felt it for a while. So when did that moment happen? Well, I started to build things here. I built a meditation, and recovery and this beautiful little 17th century, 17th century church at the end of my street called Saint Phillips and, and, it was a place where we met with other women and meditated and, you know, it was very beautiful.

00:29:29:13 – 00:29:53:10
Ryan
So creating community here became an important part of it. And I just making friends and mom friends and things like that, and feeling like I was becoming more connected to the earth and the chickens and the those things that that happened. But I think a big moment was when I went back to Los Angeles because I would go back from time to time, and that was where I felt that I wanted to get home.

00:29:53:12 – 00:30:13:13
Ryan
And so those are I was doing all the work. And, I was working these spiritual tenants, too, of like, trusting that I’d been led here. I’d been brought this far not to be dropped. And like all the things that I, you know, had had, imbibed as teachings as that blueprints or or just tenants I could go back to.

00:30:13:15 – 00:30:36:13
Ryan
And so I was working them. I was, you know, muscling with those. And then that feeling came over me, and I was excited to come home and I felt like this is where I belong now. So that was probably maybe two years, maybe two years, maybe, maybe that in that zone. So I’d say probably a year took to really feel that for, for for certain.

00:30:36:15 – 00:31:06:00
Claudia
So and you are working with, you know, all kinds of organizations and also in the corporate world, I understood. What do you feel is most important for people in the workforce, too? I mean, you you talked about the breath and taking these moments to connect with yourself. But what have you found? Is there like a red thread in the corporate world where you think, you know, we have to kind of shed this now, once and for all and move forward in a different way?

00:31:06:02 – 00:31:29:19
Claudia
I just read an article in the Harvard Business Review, because this is something that I’m also working on with my conversations, that the loneliness at work is really, is also getting into epidemic levels. And I feel, you know, we need to connect again and have real conversations where we actually are more listening than talking, because talking is, in a way, trying to be productive again.

00:31:29:21 – 00:31:40:07
Claudia
So how about the true listening? And so in your ways, what do you find is most important to instill, in the corporate world?

00:31:40:09 – 00:32:01:06
Ryan
I think that the it’s about the ability to self-soothe, right. The ability to we can’t be leaders. So I talk a lot with different leaders in different departments, that we can’t lead if we don’t have the ability to listen and to be able to if the well is not if the well is not full, then we can’t.

00:32:01:08 – 00:32:26:17
Ryan
It can’t be on empty. We can’t we can’t give away what we don’t have. So it becomes this trickle down becomes really important for the leaders in companies to be able to, not be maxed out, to not be putting so much value on productivity, which is important, but it’s also on the caliber of, presence that they have the ability to bring to bring, their problem solving.

00:32:26:19 – 00:32:43:00
Ryan
But for us to be able to make sure that they’re regulated, to make sure that they are in a place where they can receive and also be able to give. Now, this sounds very woo, and I get that. But at the end of the day, this is how we can really connect with each other when we because you know how it is.

00:32:43:00 – 00:33:05:16
Ryan
As a mom, I don’t know any moms listening, but when you’re full and you’re thinking of so many things and your kids are talking to you and they’re like, mom, mom, mom, you can’t even hear, you know that the complaints or the the, the those cues, because there’s so much going on inside and I think happens a lot, in the corporate world where the leaders themselves are such a burden on them.

00:33:05:18 – 00:33:26:03
Ryan
And I think we just have to normalize these breaks. We have to normalize these micro moments. We have to normalize, emotional upset and having a safe place to talk about things and that are isn’t measured by our productivity. I say that all the time. It’s by our, the quality of what we bring and honor that in each other.

00:33:26:03 – 00:33:50:20
Ryan
And so I think Europe has a different take on many of this. And they understand about time management and about, quality versus quantity and about, you know, those things. So we could take our a cue from them a little bit about taking off August. And like there’s just a different in my company leaves and all these different things that we are way behind in the US on.

00:33:50:22 – 00:34:12:09
Ryan
And we’re seeing we do see burnout and we do see that, people get spoken to and there’s less listening happening. But you can’t people can’t listen unless they’ve emptied themselves out in some ways. So that becomes about having tools in the toolbox. And, you know, meditation and breath. It’s not a luxury. It’s not for other people.

00:34:12:09 – 00:34:21:04
Ryan
It’s for us to be able to function at optimal levels, given the interest that we’re under, becomes the bare minimum. Truthfully.

00:34:21:05 – 00:34:30:20
Claudia
Yeah. So I’m fascinated by this crystal behind you. Oh it must be huge. Does it have a name. And it’s called.

00:34:31:01 – 00:34:32:13
Ryan
It’s an amethyst.

00:34:32:15 – 00:34:33:07
Claudia
And yes.

00:34:33:07 – 00:34:50:21
Ryan
Funny that you you because we were just talking about this when I landed here. My husband gifted it to me. It’s mother. It’s called Mother and Child. It’s from Arkansas. You spell that for me so he knows the bling bling is from. From the crystals. Yeah, yeah. You get to I mean, I love we love all. Oh.

00:34:50:21 – 00:34:52:22
Ryan
I mean, diamonds are crystals as well.

00:34:53:00 – 00:34:54:08
Claudia
They’re all. Yes, yes.

00:34:54:10 – 00:34:55:04
Ryan
Minerals. It’s their.

00:34:55:04 – 00:34:56:21
Claudia
Amplifier. Yes.

00:34:56:23 – 00:34:58:16
Ryan
Yes. You know. Yeah. It’s a it’s.

00:34:58:17 – 00:35:20:22
Claudia
Gorgeous. Yeah. It’s great. So I mean this is so fascinating and interesting. I could go on for hours, but, I want to be mindful also of your time. Just, two last questions, which I’m always curious about. Like, I’m sure that you also have a day where you’re kind of sluggish or down or not in the energy that maybe you need to be a want to be.

00:35:20:22 – 00:35:29:12
Claudia
So what’s a good way for you to energize yourself? And then also, if you happen to be an overdrive, how do you how do you send recenter yourself?

00:35:29:14 – 00:35:51:02
Ryan
Oh, these are good. You know, I’m so lucky because I do live on a farm and I have goats and I take them for walks in the field, and I usually find I sometimes I’m resistant to doing it. So I just want to normalize the resistance and it happens. And like, I don’t want to it’s cold or I don’t want to get whatever it is, or sometimes they’re unruly and you know, but I, I, I always feel better when I do it.

00:35:51:02 – 00:36:08:23
Ryan
And that helps me being in nature helps. It just helps because it’s got its own rhythm. And I’m usually if I’m in my head, I’m usually out of sync with that rhythm. And I talked about the Schumann resonance. I talked about those things. So that that’s a big one for me is getting out in nature, taking a walk, standing in the sun.

00:36:08:23 – 00:36:24:17
Ryan
The sun has healing codes. It just does. So I love that. I love doing that. And I do like this toroidal sphere around me. So I bring in the energy of the sun and to the top of the head, and I have it just move through my system, and I kind of imagine it burning out all these other things, whatever’s stuck.

00:36:24:17 – 00:36:41:09
Ryan
And then the breath, I do that, and then you can see also in front of the amethyst to have all these sound bowls. So I’ll sit and do. Yeah. No sound is been around forever. And, you know, sound travels faster and water and we’re like 80% water. So when you do, when you listen to sound, I mean you can listen to something online.

00:36:41:11 – 00:37:00:01
Ryan
I’ve been doing local sound, vocal experiences. I have a friend who has a, a place here in, in, new Hope that so I’ve been doing local sound for, a lot of women have been showing up for that, just laying down and having a little experiences because sound can bypass the mind. It just bypasses all the that the subconscious.

00:37:00:01 – 00:37:20:15
Ryan
It drops you into that theta states another tool to do that. So on that I really do. I have them laid out. I’m Abels there and I’ll play those. And that really helps shift energy and I feel palpably different afterwards. But one of the things I do first is I write. If I’m in turmoil, I don’t do a bypass and just be like, everything’s great, everything’s fine.

00:37:20:20 – 00:37:38:12
Ryan
I usually write out what’s going on for me because I’m curious. That’s really a great guidepost. I’m curious what is at the root of this? What’s happening? Is a is, you know, we’re, co co walkers on the path, so I’ll call her. And already. What are you hearing? What are you sensing about what I’m saying?

00:37:38:12 – 00:37:55:02
Ryan
So it’s someone I deeply trust and who’s going to always reflect back the highest. She’s not one is going to be like, yeah, girl, you know, let’s get that. Like she’s not. You have to choose your allies. Well, because she isn’t much value on the spiritual path and evolution as I do. So she’ll be like, you know, we we do that for each other.

00:37:55:02 – 00:38:13:21
Ryan
We mirror that back. So find a trusted advisor because again, when you’re in your head, sometimes you can’t get out of it. The thoughts that brought you into it can always get you out of it. And, you know, doing a bypass is not going to work. I was just like, I’m so happy. I’m so calm. I’m doing affirmations, you know, in those moments aren’t necessarily for the best.

00:38:13:23 – 00:38:32:09
Ryan
So curiosity, having a good team around you and then writing right down the emotion. Get it out and take a look at it, and then go back with a highlighter or a pen and heat sink. What are those words that stand out to you? I’m scared, I feel lonely, I’m sad. Look at those and and just really be with those feelings.

00:38:32:14 – 00:38:55:02
Ryan
Breathe them in and read them out. And once you know what they are and you let go of the story, the story of whatever happened. Because what we tend to do is hyper focused on the story instead, instead of the emotion underneath it. And when we do that, when we’re really coaching ourselves and we’re really sitting with ourselves and we can hold space for ourselves, we talk about holding space or things may hold space for you.

00:38:55:04 – 00:39:15:08
Ryan
This is the most important space holder is you. Those and then we often don’t know what’s going on underneath. So we don’t know why we’re triggered. So get curious. Take a moment. Write down this little you know journal to yourself I feel this. Just get it all out. Don’t edit. Don’t censor. Don’t try to be spiritual or high minded.

00:39:15:14 – 00:39:31:09
Ryan
Just let it all go. And then and then go through it and find out what are the important pieces to it. And you can ask yourself, what does this remind me of? What is? How does this feel? And then find out where that feeling is in your body, and then breathe into it and and hold space for that, those emotions.

00:39:31:09 – 00:39:36:15
Ryan
That’s what I’d say. That’s important. Then do the sound best and then do the walk in nature just and let it move through you.

00:39:36:16 – 00:39:39:14
Claudia
Oh my God, I love it. I’m gonna do it right now.

00:39:39:16 – 00:39:43:05
Ryan
Yay! Claudia.

00:39:43:07 – 00:40:06:05
Claudia
No. It’s fantastic. I mean, this so speaks to me because I’m fascinated. In a way, it’s the tools are easy, you know? I mean, they there’s no investment of money. It’s something that we can do. It’s something that we can learn. Luckily, through people like you who, you know, are connected with all this wisdom and knowledge, but also connected to the reality of life.

00:40:06:05 – 00:40:14:16
Claudia
Yeah. And again, you know, be this, like, resourceful bridge. Yes. I think that we need to enter this different stage.

00:40:14:18 – 00:40:15:18
Ryan
Yes, absolutely.

00:40:15:18 – 00:40:16:20
Claudia
What they believe I think.

00:40:17:00 – 00:40:40:01
Ryan
We’re here for I think we’re evolving in this now as a as humans, I think as a collective, I really do. I see that and, don’t get caught in the noise. Things are crumb, things are building, things are it’s all happening around us and really just anchor back to you and that’s where the power love, that’s where the agency comes from.

00:40:40:03 – 00:40:59:13
Ryan
And, walk through the fear when it’s there. Of course it’s healthy fear. You know, he was tough preservation and but if there’s something that you’ve been sitting on, it’s time. It’s time spent. We need you. We need you to be brave and bold and step forward and, you know, come from that place of centering and grounding we want.

00:40:59:13 – 00:41:23:20
Ryan
That’s what we need more of more women showing up in that way in their power. Not the fake, boss babe and all that. That’s just we’re not that’s expired. We need women and their divine feminine anchored into their power, knowing that they’re here in this pivotal time on the planet to be that light, you know, whatever that means in their own lives.

00:41:23:22 – 00:41:45:03
Ryan
And for others, it’s a mother, even. It has to be something grand. It’s just having that ability to self-soothe. I mean, the mother is the heart. The woman is the heart of the planet. I do that we carry those codes and we have forever. And it’s been very suppressed. And I think, I think true feminism is getting into your own power and then lighting the way for others.

00:41:45:05 – 00:41:48:23
Ryan
That’s what it is. And you boil it all down. That’s what it looks like.

00:41:48:23 – 00:41:57:02
Claudia
So yeah, I agree. Perfect way to end this. I’m so thankful this has been fantastic. Thank you so much for your time.

00:41:57:02 – 00:41:59:17
Ryan
Thank you for having me, Claudia. Yeah. Thank you. Everyone.

00:41:59:19 – 00:42:02:13
Claudia
All right. Okay. Bye. Bye. Ryan. Thank you so.

00:42:02:13 – 00:42:03:10
Ryan
Much for taking.

00:42:03:12 – 00:42:16:16
Claudia
The.

00:42:16:18 – 00:42:53:22
Claudia
Even though Ryan recommends to shut out the noise and turn off information flow, etc., I can listen to this podcast episode on repeat as it is truly helpful when you are trying to maneuver challenges. I can attest to that. Looking forward to connecting again with you all in season five, dropping in late July. Until then, be well and create your own routine of micro moments of connection throughout your day.

00:42:54:00 – 00:43:19:13
Claudia
Thank you for listening to Shift Happens. Please follow and subscribe to this podcast. It’s an easy hit for you with a huge impact for me. It helps me grow even further and bring you more conversations with women from around the globe. I am so happy to announce that the iconic Danish shirt brand Brett Soucek supports season four of Shift Happens.

00:43:19:15 – 00:43:57:12
Claudia
I love these shirts crafted in Europe, dedicated to the luxury of dressing with ease and delivering exceptional quality and enduring styles. Use Code Shift happens at checkout for 20% off your first purchase. Valid on full price items only. Shift happens has been created and is hosted by me, Claudia Mahler editing Andy Boroson, social media Magda Reckendrees. I hope you felt connected and heard by listening to Shift happens.

 

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